Here we are being Crass in May.

Where are you?

I went to Singapore; sorry I forgot to mention it!

And who will teach your classes?

That silly girl who has ignored you all!

She will be promoted soon as she is vacuous;

Just like the Boss and his cronies!

Who will check on her?

Who needs to?

The Boss came down from the mountains

Dressed in Damask and a thong of Gold.

His counterparts,

Suited and Booted,

Embarrassed shuffling for the school photograph.

“Sit down boy!”

But where do I sit and with whom?

“Just wear the Dunces hat and write one thousand lines”

‘I must not be a fool’.

The text went through to the Boss’ Lackey

Though he can’t read and never responds;

“I was dead for three days before you even noticed!”

“But you wrote your own eulogy; we know it was you!”

Catherine lost her job today,

Because the Boss went out to play,

Wandering aloud about the town,

So he didn’t have to watch his son go down.

You kicked me out without any fun!

Pay me! Pay me! Pay!

Third time lucky for the invertebrates.

The Chuckle Brothers came out to play at four,

But whinged when you went out of the door;

“She’s leaving early! Boo hoo!”

Then the paedophile screws up his courage,

To moan about women’s clothes.

“They should dress like neat little schoolgirls!”

He cries to his radical lover.

When winter comes, cascading elderly white amongst the youth,

Outcome the skiers,

Stupid hats, fat heads, dead, keen.

I am the Grand Old Duke of York!

Tosses his Pole to a Kazak;

Then any other girl he meets.


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