Troll – with thanks to Tolkien

I sat alone on my bar stool throne,

And punched and mumbled on a mobile phone.

For over a year I’d worked here,

Because sales were hard to come by!

Done by! Gum by!

For over a year I’d worked here,

And sales were hard to come by.

Then up comes Donna with little on her,

So we talked at length of love and honour.

I didn’t guess her occupation,

As she went on about the Russian Nation!

Inflation! Station!

 I failed to guess her occupation.

And she talked about her Nation.

Then up slimed Stan a desperate man,

Who said he’d just come from Japan.

His wife had cut his cord umbilical,

So Donna started waxing lyrical!

Empirical! Miracle!

His wife had cut his cord umbilical,

And Donna just waxed lyrical.

I was amused and a little confused,

As the guys at the bar smiled and schmoozed.

The band played louder with music thumping,

As the Russian girl got hired for humping!

Jumping! Pumping!

All I heard was the music thumping,

Then Donna was hired for humping.

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