Deaking with life… in a bar
I was welcomed as I had been there before! I sat down with a beer and a menu, and then a pissed up Australian decided I was his mate. He sat opposite me and started jabbering about being born in England but moved to Australia when he was eleven and was now retired. I told him I’d tried retiring three times but didn’t like it.
No smile.
Then he decided to call me a Scouse Bastard. Now I know Aussies call each other Bastard in a friendly way so I went along with it and explained to him that I am a Catholic Scouse Bastard.
My mistake. Turns out his father was a Scottish Presbyterian who believed in Ulster being part of Britain and that all Catholics support the IRA. I told him I had been TA Officer working with Army Cadets in the UK but he was too pissed to follow.
Fortunately the bar staff moved him away so I could eat.
Then for some reason I found myself talking with the Bar Owner. She was a kid aged 25! How the feck do you get to own a bar when you’re 25?
Family money?
Crime?
Family money from crime?
Anyway she asked if I believed in Jesus. I said I am a Physicist and find it hard to deal with the logic of religion, despite my Catholic upbringing. I hoped we would move on to another subject…
She quoted a few things from the Gospels, alleged teachings of Jesus. I pointed out the Gospels were written at least one hundred years after Jesus had died, and that the meticulous records kept by the Romans in Judaea showed no record of a prophet known as Jesus. I also asked her if she could show me where in the bible it says that Rape and Slavery are bad things, and did she realise that many of the things it says in Leviticus would probably mean that by now she probably should have stoned a few people to death.
Then I pulled out a few quotes on my Phone;
“If a man lies with a male both shall surely be put to death.
Do not leave alive anything that breathes. Destroy the entire nation. Men women children and babies.
You may beat your slave as long as they don’t die within 2 days.
If a man rapes a virgin he must pay 50 shekels to marry her.”
Her comeback?
‘You’re just old and sceptical.’
It was an interesting night!
Fairy Hanny 