Jokes – Page 11 – Fairy Hanny

Social Farting

Makes as much sense as Social Smoking! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9rIj2DWQRdw

Ancient Onanists – of course.

So were the Ancient Chinese soldiers really Onanists? And it looks like a couple have pulled the head off!

I found this story recently, about British Scientists. When a clam was dredged up from the bottom of the sea of Iceland, a team of scientists eagerly cracked it open – killing the oldest animal in the world. The mollusc was 507 years old – when it was born, Michelangelo was just about to startContinue reading “Bearded Clams”

The answer is blowing in the Brazilian Wind – another fart story

A very smelly news item. A Brazilian company said Wednesday it was bringing to market a garlic capsule designed to tackle flatulence. “This garlic oil is rich in antioxidants and deodorants and combats intestinal dysbiosis, a colon malfunction that increases flatulence,” Polias chemist Joseth Gimenes told AFP. Garlic itself is renowned for giving off aContinue reading “The answer is blowing in the Brazilian Wind – another fart story”

Church Newsletters

I found this whilst trawling… The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals. ————————– The sermon this morning: ‘Jesus Walks on the Water.’ The sermon tonight: ‘Searching for Jesus.’ ————————– Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands. ————————–Continue reading “Church Newsletters”

I have a gentle cock.

Marvellous title for a 15th Century poem/lyric. I had no idea anyone would be so enamoured of a farmyard fowl. I Have a Gentle Cock I have a gentle cock, Croweth me day; He doth me rysyn early, My matyins for to say. I have a gentle cock, Common he is of great; His combContinue reading “I have a gentle cock.”

Singing Fish

I bought a fish that sings. It is a Choona Fish.

What is a Hanny?

“What’s a Hanny?” asked Daisy as she checked out this blog. “Actually Fairyhanny is a Spoonerism,” I explained. “Like a toast to the Queer Dean instead of the Dear Queen.” “I don’t get it?” So I tried again. “Would you like to show me your toolkits?” “Are you a smart fella?” I even got herContinue reading “What is a Hanny?”

Sometimes you have to laff

Mrs Puggy Wuggy has a square cut punt. Not a punt cut square, Just a square cut punt. It’s round in the stern and blunt in the front. Mrs Puggy Wuggy has a square cut punt.

What’s love got to do with it? The formula for Happiness

I love Maths – but then I am an oddity. Does Maths make you happy? Well some guys have come up with what they call a happiness formula. For the Mathematicians, Physicists and Engineers – I know it’s not real Maths! HAPPINESS = (Mx16 + Cx1 + Lx2) + (Tx5 + Nx2 + Bx33) .Continue reading “What’s love got to do with it? The formula for Happiness”