Visualizations for a Calmer, Happier You

Calm down. Seriously.

Continuing the themes of Peace, Calm and Affirmations, here are three ways that can help to relax your mind and body. Try the crazy ones.

We all have things that leave us on edge. Sometimes it’s an event or a person (like a visit from that relative you just don’t get along with). Sometimes we’re more anxious due to more significant issues, leaving us unsure of our safety and well-being, like when a severe illness is going around. Whatever the case, anxiety is adept at derailing our lives and keeping us from accomplishing what we want and need to.

How do you handle this kind of nervous worrying? If you’re lucky, you eventually learn how to take it in stride. For some people, their coping skills aren’t healthy. For others, they flounder, trying to find their way. If you’re in these latter groups, consider this: Visualization is a proven skill shown to reduce anxiety and create a calmer and happier you. Let’s explore how.

Go Somewhere Else

Feeling especially fearful? It’s time for a trip to feel someplace safe. For some, this might be the beach. Or perhaps you’d feel more at home by a mountain lake or city café sipping coffee. Wherever you feel the safest and most at home, you want to go there now in your mind. Start by sitting back and making yourself comfortable. Close your eyes and picture yourself in your favorite place. Add in every detail you can to make this experience as real as possible. Include all your senses in the background. Breathing deeply, holding yourself in this place until you feel calm and somewhat refreshed.

Unwind with some String

Feeling all tense and coiled up inside? This usually comes when you’re holding back too many emotions. Picture yourself carrying around all these knotted emotions tangled up with words you’ve wanted to say all day but couldn’t. Make all these feelings into an imaginary ball of yarn. Now sit back and take several calming breathes as you withdraw this ball of yarn and hold it in your hand. Do you feel the weight? Good. Now drop it on the floor, holding onto the end of the string so that the ball rolls away from you, unraveling as it goes. Watch all the strands of yarn unwind, disappearing as they do. Stay in the vision until the entire ball is unwound and gone, and you’re feeling lighter and more relaxed.

Shut it Out

Our thoughts can be noisy things. We hear so many voices in our heads, reminding of us deadlines, things to do, and people to see. Add to this the negative self-talk which creeps in occasionally and the half-heard phrases we’ve carried with us, which sound suspiciously like our parents, and you’ve got a lot of chatter and no peace. For this kind of problem, visualize yourself in a room with a big open window. Set all these voices outside the window. Now, take a deep breath and shut the window firmly. This is a nice thick double-paned glass. You can no longer hear the voices when the window is closed.

With visualizations like these, you tell your mind to calm. You take back control where you need it most and set your feet back on a better path. Remember, you’re in charge of what goes on in your head. Don’t let anxiety set the tone for you.

Ways to Become a Calmer Person

We hear a lot about how to be calm and why calmness is essential. But why?! What does “calm” really do for someone? If you’re feeling like being calm gets in the way of your motivation and achievement-focused mentality, you’re not alone. I am currently feeling a little stressed at the thought of returning to England and going through the Covid self-isolation rigmarole, being tested on day 2 and day 8 of a 10 day period. And then if someone on my flight tests positive I will have to quarantine for 14 days. Add to that I have no address and no job to go to…

So some advice on being calm!

A lot of people associate calmness with nonchalance, but in reality, it’s what helps you have a clear mind so that you can achieve all of your dreams and goals. You’ve got to start somewhere, so here are five ways to become a calmer person: 

1. Go All In 

Just like when you learn a new language, in order to become calmer, you need to immerse yourself in the headspace fully. That means the mind, body, and soul. Whether you decide to download a meditation app or start going to yoga classes, the important thing is that you commit to it. 

2. Surround Yourself with Calm

Tapping into the immersion piece, another way to become calmer is to surround yourself with calming imagery. Maybe you’ll paint your walls a color that makes you happy and serene. Or perhaps you’ll add a fountain in your room for soothing background noise. 

3. Take a Break When You Need One

The hustle is great, but sometimes you need a break. Breaks are good for the mind, especially when you’re usually working hard! Let your mind go through its unconscious thoughts so that its conscious self can get back to work when you wake up. 

4. Let Conflict be Conflict 

Sometimes, we get into conflict, and we take all the blame. Or we hand the blame over to someone else. Either way, engaging in conflict and letting it consume you is not the way to attain calmness for your mind. The next time you find yourself getting wrapped up in conflict, take a step back, and ask yourself what good it is doing for you. If it’s not doing any good — and most of the time, it’s not—step away and let the conflict be conflict. 

5. Observe from Far Away

It’s one thing to choose not to engage in something, whether it be a conflict or a toxic relationship. It’s another thing to decide to observe from far away, detach and then let go. For some people, it takes years to nail down the art of observing and detaching. It doesn’t matter how long it takes you — go at your own pace, and you’ll see progress. 

5 Things You Can Do Today to Start Using Affirmations in Your Life

Affirmations are a powerful way to help you reach your goals. They can build optimism and turn around a negative mindset. And they work most effectively if you repeat them until they become part of your self-talk. I am currently working through a couple of motivational classic books which both stress the power of affirmations: Think and Grow Rich and The 7 Habits of Highly Effective people.

But saying your affirmations to yourself in front of the mirror can get old fast. You need to find more creative ways of building your affirmation practice into your routine. Supercharge your motivation by injecting a little affirmation sauce into every aspect of your day.

  • Write Your Affirmations

Writing your affirmations makes them more tangible. Studies have shown that the physical act of writing enables your brain to remember better. In many Universities students are being told to stop taking notes on laptops and to start writing things down. Choose your favorite way of recording your own affirmations. Keep a journal; write post-it notes and leave them where they’re easy to see, on your fridge, bathroom mirror, and computer. Set reminders on your smartphone or tablet with the text of each affirmation at different times of the day.

  • Make Affirmation Themed Art

This might sound a little off the wall, but try making art themed around your affirmations. Use paint, collage, clay, or colored pencils, and let your Inner Child play with colors and shapes to interpret how your affirmations make you feel.

  • Turn Your Affirmations into Music

Take a familiar or favorite tune and sing your affirmations instead of the regular lyrics. If you’re musical, maybe you can write a song that uses your affirmations. Make a rap song about your affirmations and create a dance routine to go with it. Mind you when you have as many decades behind you as I have, dancing gets a bit stiff!

Photo by Meruyert Gonullu on Pexels.com
  • Vision Board Your Affirmations

Vision boards are powerful tools for setting out your goals. Affirmations can sometimes feel a little abstract. Using a vision board can help you come up with concrete images of what you want in your life. Look for photos that inspire you and make you feel good. You can make a physical vision board or use an internet platform like Pinterest.

  • Get inspired

Look around for motivational speakers and writers whose approach to life appeals to you. You can find plenty of motivational talks on the internet, on platforms like TED Talks and YouTube. Search for motivation from people you admire or those who have made their dreams come true while overcoming adversity. Two of my favourites are Make Your Bed and Denzel Washington.

It’s essential to find someone whose values and approach feel right for you. Don’t watch an influencer just because they’re popular. Check back with your affirmations to see if their themes ring true to you.

5 Things You Can Be Hopeful About Even When It Looks as if All is Lost

In April of this year I had a bad case of Covid 19. It wasn’t bad enough to put me in hospital though it got close; I had a nurse come to my apartment for 5 evenings to administer an intravenous drip and my temperature spiked at 42 Celsius, making me hallucinate. I am currently living in Baku, Azerbaijan and discovered my ‘world class medical insurance’ did not cover Covid treatment. There went a month’s salary…

I decided it was time to quit this itinerant life and head back to the UK. I’ve had a great time of the past 15 years living and working in Florida, Qatar, Abu Dhabi, China, Kazakhstan, Gran Canaria, Casablanca and Azerbaijan, plus the opportunities to travel in those areas. I now find I am heading home without a place to live or a job to go to; a scary time indeed. I dug out some of my PLR to help guide me and others over the next few months as I transition back to the UK.

Everyone has times in their life when things look grim. They might even seem to be hopeless. The world can feel like a scary place, and you feel alone in the middle of it. History has shown that even in the worst of times, people have chosen to be hopeful. If you’re finding it hard to believe that better times will come, here are five things you can hang on to.

  • Your Health

No matter what type of life crisis you’re going through, if you have your health, you’re wealthy. You might take it for granted, but being strong and healthy is probably your biggest asset.

Look after your body, eat well, stay fit, and be game-ready for the next opportunity.

  • The Sun will Rise Tomorrow

Even the worst day comes to an end, and you get a chance to do better tomorrow. Brooding over past failures is as pointless as worrying about the future. You can only deal with what is right in front of you.

Take your motto from Scarlett O’Hara and remember that tomorrow is another day.

  • You Are Full of Potential

Do you believe you can live your best life? Do you think you can be successful, famous, and happy? Or does it feel to you that success is only for the lucky few?  

All humans are born full of potential. The only thing stopping you from meeting your potential is you. Change your mindset from self-doubt to self-confidence, and you can do whatever you set your mind to.

  • Learn to Look on the Bright Side

It’s highly unlikely that everything in your life will go wrong at once. Sometimes they do and that tests you through and through. As an example, I got divorced December 2014, then was forced to sell my house June 2015, then my mother died January 2016; three of the biggest life stresses in just over a year! Yet I am still here, planning the next steps and feeling positive about the future. So learn to hang onto the good things in your life and be grateful. No matter what situation you find yourself in, it could pretty much always be worse.

If you look for abundance, you will find it. Practice looking for things to be thankful for, starting with being alive right now. And remember, hard times come and hard times go. Better times are just around the corner.

  • Challenges Make You Stronger

If you’re down in the trough of a life crisis, remember that when you come out of the other end, you’ll be stronger and smarter than before. You will have learned things about yourself and what you’re capable of that would never have occurred to you before. And in spite of feeling crushed, you have triumphed, you made it!

Private Label Rights

I have a lot of PLR stored on my drive!

Some of it has been there for years and should probably be deleted. However I still find a lot of it to be very useful as a source for my blogs. I take the original and edit, customise, delete and add sections. Sometimes there are links to sites or software that has changed or disappeared. I find it is important to check out all of these links before publishing.

I also have access to a lot of free content – and I am giving away SureFireWealth.com Free One Year Silver Membership.

Due to private label being distributed to multiple customers, and without being exclusive or unique content, some marketers are hesitant on incorporating private label content into their marketing campaigns.

Private Label Content is best used as a “resource” rather than a ‘source”.

This means that you should start revising and improving existing private label content before distributing it under your own brand.

Photo by Janiere Fernandez on Pexels.com

Private Label Right’s content comes in many different formats, including PLR reports, eBooks, articles, graphics, templates, email newsletters and even videos. For my blogs I get reports or eBooks or graphics – often for free. If you want some free content then follow this link.

All PLR will come with a License of some sort.

While licenses differ with each author and seller, the basic premise is that the license permits buyers to re-brand the content under their own name and brand (excluding copyright). In general practice this means that the product can be modified, sold, resold or repurposed in many different formats. In some cases authorship on the original product is allowed and with unrestricted private label, buyers are often able to resell the same rights they’ve acquired although not all private label releases offer or permit license distribution or transfer.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Here is an example of the sort of thing you will see in a License;

[YES] Can edit, take apart, add to, or sell as is 

[YES] Can be offered as a bonus

[YES] Can be used for opt-in bonuses (newsletter signups, etc.)

[YES] Can be added to paid membership sites

[YES] Can claim full authorship

[YES] Can publish as free web content like blog posts, articles, and social media posts

[NO] Can Distribute PSDs in any way.

[NO] Can Sell resell rights

[NO] Can sell master resell rights

[NO] Can sell private label rights 

[YES] Add to free membership sites

Private Label Content comes with different rights depending on the developer so it’s important to thoroughly check each license prior to use, to become familiar with any restrictions that may be in place.

Some possible Advantages to using PLR:

  • Saving time.
  • Saving money, compared to hiring a writer or buying exclusive rights
  • Can be used to generate ideas for blogging or content marketing
  • Can be re-purposed into different types of digital products

Special offer. Today I am giving away one year Free access to Surefire Wealth Silver licence which normally sells for $147/year. Just follow this link.

Let me know what you think.

Writing tips – sort your life out!

Here are some ideas for organising you ‘writing life’. It isn’t easy to achieve each of these as real life often gets in the way. Trust me – getting the family to give you space is difficult as they can be very demanding on your time. Just remember, getting one page completed is much better than nothing!

Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com
  1. Set your boundaries early for work and family. Let them know when you will be contactable and when you won’t. This will allow the initial space to build a strong structural base to work from. 

2. Pick a space where you feel you’ll do your best work. If you can tweak it so that natural light is on you throughout the day and source a proper chair that protects your posture along with any other environmental tweaks that make things easy and comfortable (ergonomics, indoor plants) then space will remain an attractive space to operate in for years to come. 

Photo by Any Lane on Pexels.com

3. Make sure you allocate time in your day to support your physical and mental wellbeing. Include breaks for fun, meditation, exercise and any other activity that leaves you feeling refreshed. In simple terms, balancing working hard with playing hard. 

4. Plan your meals and snacks with the most nutrient-dense food like fresh fruits or vegetables often. This will help support immunity, manage weight and support your brainpower. Don’t rely on willpower. You won’t have enough to go around. Plan it, prep it and cook it. 

5. Get your most important task done early when your willpower will be at its highest. Use the Pomodoro technique for single focus to zero in on tasks and control as many distractions as possible in advance of your workload.

Covid – wow!

I didn’t realise the longer term effects it could have. I haven’t written or published anything on my blog in the two months since I had it. Always tired and lacking focus. Now is the time to ‘get back in the saddle’.

I still remember the start. Friday 2nd April I went out with some friends – there were five of us in all. We went to a restaurant, then to the rotating bar at the Baku Hilton (I live on the next block), then on to a pub close to me. In the next week 4 of us were diagnosed with Covid, and with me being by far the oldest, I suffered the most.

Where did we contract it? In one of the bars?  Did one of us already have it? How come 4 out of 5? Maybe the 5th person was an asymptomatic carrier?

It doesn’t matter.

Putting it into perspective of other respiratory ailments I’ve had in the past; it was a lot worse than flu but not as bad as pneumonia – that one almost killed me! At the worst point my temperature was up at 42° C and my lovely lady was cooling me with a mix of cold water and vinegar, and I was raving on about something – I don’t really remember this. Then the doctor found I had kidney stones, so for 5 nights a paramedic came to my home and administered a drip to help break the stones down.

Meanwhile my school was still operating online classes. I know that each day I was typing instructions for my classes into Google Classroom, though I didn’t have the energy to go into Zoom lessons. Nobody was tasked with covering my lessons, which led to a complaint from one parent. When I went back onto Zoom in the second week I had to laugh at my own on screen image – totally white face, sunken cheeks and bags under my eyes.

As I recovered it was time for reflection.

I still love teaching but I have had enough of schools. Too much data being recorded and analysed by people who should really be in the classroom teaching! And attitudes have changed. In my early days as a teacher I made mistakes and fought to control classroom behaviour and I could always rely on backup from senior staff. These days when kids misbehave we are just told it’s because we are bad teachers. Meanwhile those dishing out that useless advice sit in quiet offices looking at spreadsheets…

I decided to quit and head home to Liverpool. I started teaching in September 1981 so forty years has been good!  I’ve taken time out for various reasons over the years (I missed 10 months when I had a horrible motorcycle accident and came close to having my right leg amputated – thank God for the skill of NHS surgeons). I spent a lot of time teaching in the UK though the last 15 years has been spent on contracts in Qatar, Abu Dhabi, China, Kazakhstan, Azerbaijan, Gran Canaria and Morocco. It has been fantastic fun – I just don’t want to do it anymore!

My reflections took me back to reading a couple of classics to help me re-focus my ideas. I am working my way through ‘Think and Grow Rich’ and ‘The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People’. When I get back to UK I will get all of my books out of storage and the first one to the top of the pile will be ‘Rich Dad, Poor Dad’.

When I get back to ‘blighty’ I will work to open a Kumon tuition centre for several evenings a week. This will give me time to focus on something I have dallied with over the years – creative writing. I have the outline for about 9 books in my head, plus a book of poetry and several volumes of reflections on my teaching career, the latest of which has the working title ‘You’re welcome to Baku’! I will work on my blogs including some personal reflections, short stories, extracts from my novels, insights to Online Business and some edited PLR articles.

I have been impressed by the amount of support, follows and likes on my blogs. I hope to continue keeping you informed and entertained over the coming years.

The Benefit of Accepting Those You Don’t Like and How to Get Started

Let’s face it, you’re not going to like everyone.

Sometimes the feeling is mutual. We meet someone who just rubs us up the wrong way. You’re instant rivals, right down to the barely suppressed sneer and curled lip.

Other times it’s not quite so dramatic. You might be making every effort to build a relationship, but they’re just not having it. Or there’s some previous history standing in the way of a relationship with someone.

Whatever the case, there comes a time to let dislike go. Holding onto animosity, even something so subtle as not wanting to be around a certain individual at work only winds up hurting you in the end. In fact, you might be missing out on some hidden benefits by accepting someone you don’t like.

Intrigued? Read on to discover the why of it, and better yet, the how.

The benefits of accepting those you dislike are many:

  • Reduces stress caused by the tension within the relationship
    • Cuts down anxiety regarding what the other person will say or do
      • Frees you from destructive thought patterns regarding this individual
        • Allows you to enjoy your relationships fully without worrying about how someone will or won’t react

In order to get started, you only need to follow these three steps.

Photo by Keira Burton on Pexels.com

Address Any Fears

Frequently, when we dislike someone, it’s because they’re triggering us somehow. By looking deeper into the emotions being raised, and addressing them, you’ll be able to let go of a lot of the negativity you’re feeling toward them. This is especially true of fears, which have a way of looking like a lot of other things, such as dislike.

Let Go of the Anger

Much like fears, anger has a way of keeping up a pretense of hearty dislike. This is what happens when you let things fester, especially over something you’ve been holding onto for a while.

Pro tip? Try forgiveness.

Lay the past to rest between you and try accepting this individual now, in the moment.

Look for the Good in the Relationship

If you’re caught up in dislike, you might not have noticed there has been a positive impact on your relationship. Look for the things you’ve learned from the individual. Even harsh lessons have a way of guiding us onto new paths, benefitting us in the long run.

Sometimes we do ourselves a great disservice by hanging onto an immediate feeling of dislike for someone. As humans who grow and change, if we allow for it, relationships with those we don’t like can improve. Even if the connection never becomes stronger, accepting that the person is just the way they are will bring more peace into your life.

Rise like the Phoenix