The old dog wandered wondering. What was he hoping for as he dodged across the road, avoiding cars, crazy motorcyclists and trams? Perhaps a tasty snack from the waiters at the Barron Ottoman? They stroked him. The kebab man cut, folded, served; ignored the old dog. He came my way though fish was not onContinue reading “Istanbul 3. Notes from a bar at Sultanahmet.”
Author Archives: Phoenix
I love Kazakhstan
Well I have been living here in Almaty since January and it is a beautiful place. It has the second best prettiest women in the world – Liverpool Judy’s always win. But I have to laugh at some of the names I have come across recently. There are ladies called Karlygash, Nazgul and Nurgul. PlusContinue reading “I love Kazakhstan”
Eye opening drinks…
Sometimes things just don’t seem right. Interesting Orange Juice I just bought in Kazakhstan… Apparently the Russian says “First Hand Quality”
Istanbul 2. Reflections and an Introduction to Rumi.
I think a hangover makes jet-lag so much easier to bear. Eventually I arose Monday morning and decided to do the tourist bit, so headed to the City centre in one of the many millions of taxis that constantly patrol the streets. Don’t get into a taxi and ask for ‘Haggia Sofia’ even though theContinue reading “Istanbul 2. Reflections and an Introduction to Rumi.”
Back again.
Long summer break. Very lazy with posts. Spent all of my writing time editing my latest fantastically hilarious book featuring the voluptuous Fairy Hanny. “Trans Uranic Elements: The Dark Side of Uranus.” will be available via Amazon as a Paperback or Kindle version before the end of the year. Love and kisses, Swifty
Istanbul 1 : Getting Lost and finding Old Friends.
Atatürk Airport 9.30 pm on a Saturday night. Check papers, work your way through customs, throw off the term spent in Kazakhstan. Greeted by an old friend and guided to his Gaff. Meet the charming new partner; fantastic dinner with lovely wine. But then out in the City by midnight looking for a bar thatContinue reading “Istanbul 1 : Getting Lost and finding Old Friends.”
The sayings of DC Jason Beaver
Sadly young Beaver is not the smartest detective at the picnic. He misquotes though I’m not sure if it is deliberate or not… Water off a Dutch back. No pockets in a crowd. Daft as a bush. You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him think. Too many cooks spoil theContinue reading “The sayings of DC Jason Beaver”
On First encounter with Rumi.
Sitting, watching, pondering, wandering. Istanbul bookshops and bizarre bazaars; favourite city, Oozing my childhood testament from every pore, City battered and beaten and rocked to its core. “Simon! Simon! Phillip wants your money, pay up or die!” Armies marching, marching, marching; did you hear that Mr March? Constantinople; Byzantium; Istanbul. Three Cities in One, likeContinue reading “On First encounter with Rumi.”
Woman with big Beaver
Malaysian man comes up short after buying £100 penis enlarger online… but gets sent a £5 magnifying glass with warning ‘Do not use in sunlight’
A vain Malaysian man who ordered a penis enlarger online was stunned when the device was delivered – a magnifying glass! To add insult to injury the magnifying glass came with an instruction that would at least prevent the man from causing injury to himself. It read: Do Not Use in Sunlight. The victim ofContinue reading “Malaysian man comes up short after buying £100 penis enlarger online… but gets sent a £5 magnifying glass with warning ‘Do not use in sunlight’”
Fairy Hanny 