In BED with CBA syndrome! Send me an OAR!

Deep, Deep within me!

Somewhere inside is a brilliant writer. He has plans for two more Fairy Hanny books, at least 4 Inspector Flaange books, the epic story of life at St. Nedds and the trilogy called ‘Going to California’, a semi-autobiography of growing through the 70’s, 80’s and now.

Sadly I am in BED with CBA syndrome.

BED

Blame

Excuses

Denial

with a massive dose of CBA – Can’t Be Arsed.

I need the support of an OAR, some peeps to help me reclaim

Ownership

Accountability

Responsibility.

I think I have an Angel in Liverpool who will help… and another in Almaty.

Oh Mr. Keats – I only borrrowed a couple of lines…

Gathering Grapes to drink one night.

Oh what can ail thee Lana Scan?

Alone and palely loitering?

Come and sit beside the Lake,

And listen to me sing.

“Heaven knows when I might see,

A Monkey in The Banyan Tree,

Coming down to look at me

Offering a cup of tea.

“In times gone by I used to cry

As Camel boys spat in my eye.

Now I feel with an awesome sigh,

Thank God those days have passed me by.

“Then I think upon this Great Globe,

Suspended from my earlobe

Is a painful Periodontal Probe,

And a man dressed in a bloody Thobe.

“It gets me up, it gets me down,

The stairways in this cold Town.

Seventeen Baboons, a horse and a Clown,

It makes Commuters stop and Frown.

“I wonder at the sycophants gall,

Who lied his way into the Ball,

I’ll ask a Gibbon, lean and tall,

To smash his Head against the wall.

“Then came an Ass , an erstwhile Leader,

I said he’s just a fucked up Bleeder,

Duplicitous bastard – Journal Reader,

Definitely a Bottom Feeder.

“Six times a day I’m out of my class,

Gathering paper to shove up my Ass.

Those Work Generators totally Crass;

Dossers have reached a Critical Mass.

“None can touch me, Old and Wary,

Not even Fat Bum, big and hairy,

We zipped through the trees – very scary,

Some kids and us; Peter and Mary.

“And just this week the World went Moony,

Inflated egos rap till Noony.

But I don’t care because I know soony,

I’ll share some wine with a Fairy loony.”

And so sweet Lady in the Meads,

Full Beautiful – a Fairy Child.

Come buy a beer, any kind;

Lager, Bitter or even Mild.

I sit beside the fire and think – Tolkein

I sit beside the fire and think
of all that I have seen
of meadow-flowers and butterflies
in summers that have been;

Of yellow leaves and gossamer
in autumns that there were,
with morning mist and silver sun
and wind upon my hair.

I sit beside the fire and think
of how the world will be
when winter comes without a spring
that I shall ever see.

For still there are so many things
that I have never seen:
in every wood in every spring
there is a different green.

I sit beside the fire and think
of people long ago
and people who will see a world
that I shall never know.

But all the while I sit and think
of times there were before,
I listen for returning feet
and voices at the door.

Time Flies.

I took my watch on an Aeroplane…

I can’t believe it is over a month since I bothered with Fairy Hanny and her delightful adventures. Coming back to Kazakhstan, new idiots to deal with, old girlfriends coming back, new girls acting just like the old ones, a minor flood in my apartment, extra work as one teacher didn’t turn up, extra work because new jobsworths did turn up…

So Hanny and her adventures have been neglected.

Never mind – Pistachio nuts cost a lot in Almaty so I am savouring them by eating the shells too!

(Not really – that is what could be called a joke)

I am also dealing with some Orwellian Double Speak and Kafkaesque bureaucracy.

  1. Orwell – we are expanding one aspect by reducing the time available…
  2. Kafka – we are having meetings to design the forms that we will use in future meetings as we plan forms to examine every aspect of life in school.

What a wonderful world.

Meanwhile some colleagues have just 2 hours to teach per week…